Sunday, October 14, 2012

Ode to Fail-Bakes

A year ago my cakes were horrendous
To the point where their content was dangerous.
Once I used salt
Not sugar (in fault)
So the thought of baking was preposterous.

I kid thee not that a year ago - nay, 6 months ago! - I could not bake. I found some photos to share with you, to partially prove my point, but also for your amusement!
This was my attempt at lemon drizzle cupcakes!

Above is a fine example of a cake that I have named after the epic tv show, Lost. The 'Lost' cake is  a most excellent way to decorate (I feel 'salvage' is a little too strong a word) a cake that is lost beyond all hope. All you need is some ready-made royal icing, and some squeezy chocolate writing icing.  And don't forget your plastic googley-eyes for the Smoke Monster's finishing touches! None of that 'home made' malarky for this work of art!

Finally, my piece de resistance. Below is the cake that earned its locally infamous title 'Salt Cake'.   This recipe merely requires you to confuse sugar with salt. I highly recommend trying the batter before pouring into your baking tins, as the saltiness will recoil your tongue. Add more 'sugar' to the batter, in hope of sweetening the mixture. Eventually place the cake in the oven, and hope that the heat will change the saltiness to pure confectioner's delight. Suggested occasion for the cake is April Fool's Day. 

Simply decorate with a sea-side image, elegantly incorporating the cake's flavour with its image. Cocktail umbrellas are a must. 

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